BRILLIANT WEEKEND IN THE LONDON FOG
There is really no other option when it comes to avoiding a particularly cold week at home in the USA than jumping on a quick flight overseas.
But Brendan, it’s cold there too!
Correct, but I’d rather escape the cold in one (or two) of many cozy pubs in London. Since it was my first time, we decided to stick to the basics and stay in the City of London right off Trafalgar Square. Yes, it’s touristy but that’s exactly what we were: tourists. And of course, the first time in a new city you must knock out the basic tourist destinations up front and save the deep dive into local culture for subsequent trips.
All in due time, right?
Steeped in History, the city of London has more important sites than one could possibly do on a long weekend so my recommendation, naturally, is to take a deep breath and start where any rational minded person would start. The pub. But which pub? Any pub!
But wait! I’m getting ahead of myself. First, drop the Wranglers and Justins, the Carhartt jacket and truckers cap because you’re in London, not freaking Tulsa and maybe, just maybe you want to fit in. You need that black down insulated jacket, the dark jeans that are tight around the ankles, and the black adidas shoes. Don’t forget the cheeky scarf worn breezily around the neck.
Ok, on to the pub. Again, any pub will do but the cooler the name, the cooler the pub…or at least the cooler your Facebook check-in post will look. You can’t go wrong with any pub that starts with the words “Ye Olde”.
Ye Olde Cheshire Cheese.
Ye Olde Mitre Tavern.
Or how about the random-named pubs?
The Slug and Lettuce.
The Ship and Shovell.
We stuck to the pubs along the Thames from the Palace at Westminster to the Tower Bridge. You’ll notice that quite a few of them have the same menu. Same owner. Not a lot of variety. Must have been bad right? Wrong!
You’re in London for the first time, enjoy it. Meat Pies. Sausages and Mash. Double fried chips and curry sauce. Stop it.
While sipping on a lovely glass of Cask Ale and liberally dropping the F bomb during the course of regular conversation, I slowly sank into what we all think the perfect submersion into British life means. Cask Ale is a delightful nectar sent directly down from your deity of choice into a pint glass then down the hatch. Slightly chilled and lightly carbonated, this beer has none of the preservatives and chemicals we’re used to ingesting but loads of deep malty notes and rich aromas. You know it’s good if each batch needs to be consumed in under a week or it goes off.
But Brendan why the F Bombs!?
By F Bomb I mean Firkin! I don’t mean like an American trying to imitate the British accent saying things like “This firkin Cask Ale is firkin good!” No, I mean the cask itself is a firkin which is a nine-gallon keg, roughly 72 beers which, I like to say, is a great night on the Firkin piss!! Anyhoo…
Stumbling out of the Sherlock Holmes pub on Northumberland Street with a belly full of ale, I finally understand what the London Fog really means. The fresh air is exhilarating as we take a nice walk down the Thames toward the Tower Bridge. The stark differences in architecture reflect long, progressive history of the city and accomplishes the right balance between the old and the new. The streets are bustling with hustlers from joggers to tourists to businessmen late for a meeting. The river is as packed as the streets with boats of all sizes and missions. The streets are as numerous as a web and unstructured and unpredictable as the winds rushing hurriedly in every direction through the remarkable buildings.
Finally to the London Bridge and across the river to the most extraordinary parts of the trip. Follow the crowds into the Borough Markets where people of every sort weave their way through the hungry and thirsty throngs where the craftsmen peddle their wares and the culinary artists show off their talents all in the open air between the buildings.
If you can’t find something there to eat, then you’re just not hungry.
From the Mulled Jolly Fig to the Rhubarb and Quince, nothing here is left to the imagination. After a succulent lunch of Bomba Paella which is prepared and served right in from of you from a massive wok looking thing the size of a throw rug, off to collect some dinner items. Endless ice tables with fish of all sorts, their beady eyes glaring and daring you to prepare them properly. There are massive crabs with claws the size of baseballs and octopus with their slimy arms carelessly cascading over the table and almost touching the floor.
Then the beef and chicken table. Uh, for another day because we’re in a hotel and not cooking anything anyway. Back to Trafalgar Square for another pint. Or two. The Horse and Guardsman features a massive painting of British Cavalry in full charge at the Battle of Waterloo. Absolutely perfect. End the day with a meat pie and a firkin pint of Camden Hells Lager. Or two. Or at least until you’re knackered.
But Brendan, there’s so much more to see and experience in London!
All in due time.